Dana White and the coaches enter the gym and White addresses his peons by giving his stump speech. “We like guys who fight”, “ We’re looking for guys who want to fight”, all things he’s said and we’ve heard before. Of note though is the fact that this season once again they will be utilizing the Wild Card rules so the crowd will be diminished from 28 to 14 and then to 7, but after that they will choose 2 wild cards to compete for the last quarterfinal slot. St. Pierre is seen smirking his way through all of the festivities.
This being the season premiere this episode will consist of them charging through 14 fights as fast as humanly possible.
Marc Stevens vs. T.J. O’Brien- This fight is shown in its entirety because it lasts all of 13 seconds. Stevens came to play and scores an immediate and super impressive TKO victory. Possibly somebody to watch.
Spencer Paige vs. Steve Magdaleno- A highly entertaining though all together amateurish bout. The fighters only stop throwing crazy wild punches when it comes time to throw crazy wild elbows. These kids are hungry and that is something that will always be appreciated. Paige takes the judge’s decision though it does beg the question of is it really too much to ask for the actual scores. What are they keeping from us.
Nam Phan vs. Mike Budnik- Phan is my pre-show pick to go all the way. Fascinating fight to watch as Phan plays the role of undersized grappler but somehow manages to seem in control the entire time. Then Nam puts of a wholly different hat and delivers one of those exotic body shot knock outs, this one delivered precisely to the liver.
Andy Main vs. Jason Brenton- The highlight reel version of this fight. Main earns himself a bed with an armbar submission.
Ran Weathers vs. Jonathon Brookins- Also in abridged form, Brookins wins handily while talking head Dana White shills for him hard core.
Sako Chivitchian vs. Toby Grear- We see next to nothing of this fight that went the distance and to the judges table where they declared Chivitchain the winner.
Daniel Head vs. Jeffrey Lentz- St. Pierre makes an ass out of himself by boldly predicting a victory for Head and then having to watch as he is pummeled, ground and pound style, into oblivion. The first and only real blood bath of the opening round.
Paul Barrow vs. Alex Caceres- St. Pierre and White both declare open man love for Caceres, a man who found it fitting to walk down to the cage in a bring yellow body suit. The fight is a blast to watch as Caceres bounces around the cage like a Mexican jumping bean. He eventually seals the deal for himself via rear naked choke. Post fight White won’t shut up about how happy Caceres is and how he never stopped smiling the whole time he was fighting. I hope he likes smiling because for as long as he’s in the UFC that will be his strictly enforced gimmick.
Pablo Gaze vs. Michael Johnson- Johnson looks like a monstrous Lightweight. His fighting style itself is hard to gage in this short form version of his fight but from what I saw the man can swing a mean fist and isn’t afraid of using it.
Michael Richman vs. Aaron Wilkinson- Wilkinson, one of the two Brits to be found this season, coasted to an easy decision victory. Then, poor guy, has his British accent subtitles as he gives his post-fight thoughts.
Kyle Watson vs. Joseph Duffy- The other Euro, Duffy, doesn’t have the same luck sadly, as his previously undefeated record takes a hit thanks to Watson and his ability to synch on a rear naked choke. This must be absolutely heartbreaking for these potential cast mates to have a lifetime of work be ground into dust thanks to one fight…but it is the UFC and no matter how big they get there will always be only so much space on the roster.
J.J. Ambrose vs. Sevak Magakian- Ambrose, my other pick to go to the finals, sadly won’t even be moving into the house. For the most part the fight isn’t shown at all but we are told by White that for the most part the match consisted of Magakian laying on top of a rather useless Ambrose. Oh well, there is always next season.
Cody McKenzie vs. Amir Khillah- Khillah uses his interview time to talk about how he wants to become the Bisping of the Middle East. This despite the fact that he, himself, can’t even gain entry to the house and looks rather shitty in getting choked out by McKenzie’s modified guillotine.
Ariel Sexton vs. Dane Sayers- Sexton declares before the fight that he does not want to touch gloves. Why is he being a bad sport you may ask, he’s not. Rather he is just blowing his spot as the round opens and he charges full speed across the cage to try and win early with a flying knee. White oversells the whole spectacle by nearly falling out of his chair with excitement. I mean maybe had he knocked the guy out then we would have had a story, instead I’m just playing over aggressive and that may hurt him down the road.
And with that, whew, we are done with the season premier of The Ultimate Fighter. Next week we’ll pick teams and see how this season is going to play out. Anything is possible and the only thing that’s for sure is that nothing is for sure.
